It took me a while to start this new part of my blog. If you follow me on Instagram, you might have noticed that I created a “sister page” called @grief_baking where I’ll share my experience with grief while I bake in my kitchen. And you might ask: Why grief? Well friends, grief is something we do not talk that much (death included). I know grief is a very personal process, but it can be very lonely too. If you have never experienced grief in your life specially with losing someone super close to you, you might not understand what I’m talking about and I’m not trying to make you feel bad about this. When my dad died almost 4 months ago, I got many messages from people I don’t even know from around the world sharing their experience with grief and shared stories and real kind words that have been helping me with this process. Yes, some family and friends have been there for me since my dad passed but a lot of them did not know how to act, what to say and sometimes even the things they said were hurtful for me, I am sure they did not mean to be disrespectful about my loss. So, I decided to pay more attention to people who have been/are in my shoes, read books and allow me to do and feel whatever I think is right for me.
Why create another page? Because I want to keep my Instagram @pastry_tales about the fun, holiday, everyday baking while this new part @grief_baking will be for everyone who would like to join me or know about this grief process. All kinds of grief are welcome here. If you feel uncomfortable about me talking about death, grief and everything in between, you can just stay with the happy part of this blog. I think many people will relate with me and I just want to make them feel less lonely on this journey.
My first recipe is ” Toblerone Chocolate Cookies” because my dear father loved Toblerone. Since I moved to the states and every time, I went to Peru to visit my family, I asked if he would like something special from here and the first thing that came to his mind was chocolate specially Toblerone. He really enjoyed eating this chocolate. When we placed him in the geriatric clinic, I bought him Toblerone for special occasions but the last time I saw him last April, I brought a big Toblerone for him (those that are huge for Christmas season) but he could not eat it. He was already choking on solid foods, and I just had to keep the chocolate away from him. I felt terrible because he could not enjoy the chocolate, he liked the most, he could not enjoy anything special anymore. Prior to my visit, he had a very bad “choking” episode where he lost almost all the ability to swallow solids. We even had to thicken everything he drank, which was hard because he really did not enjoy it, and he was ingesting less and less fluids. I tried to visit him every day and brought him homemade food chopped in little pieces and little by little during those 6 weeks I stayed in Peru, my dad started to eat more solids again, not like before but at least some.
Anyway, every time I go to the store and walk by the candy aisle and see Toblerone, I get this flashback of him eating chocolate and that is why today I’m sharing this story and recipe with you.
Also, I would like to mention that I got the idea for these cookies from Jane at Jane’s Patisserie
Let’s start with the recipe and if you would like to see the video of how I made them, visit me on Instagram @grief_baking
Yield about 18 regular size cookies
Ingredients
9 tablespoons of butter at room temperature
1/2 cup of light brown sugar
1/3 cup white granulated sugar
1 egg at room temperature
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 cups all-purpose flour
1/3 cup cocoa powder. I used dark cocoa powder.
1 and 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 Toblerone bars of 3.52 oz. each. One bar chopped in pieces and the other one you will keep for placing small triangles on top after baking.
Directions
1.- In a bowl mix all the dry ingredients: flour, cocoa powder, baking powder, baking soda and salt. I like to use a sifter, so I do not have any big chunks of baking soda or cocoa powder in my cookie dough. Set aside.
2.- In another bowl and using a paddle attachment, cream your butter for about a minute. Then, add brown and granulated sugar and keep mixing for 2 minutes. Add in egg, keep mixing in middle speed. Add vanilla and keep mixing for 2 minutes until everything looks fluffy.
3.- In low speed, add in the dry ingredients and mix until everything is well combined. Add in chopped Toblerone, mix. The dough might look a bit dry but trust the process because these cookies are delish.
4.- Using a spoon or a small cookie scoop, make balls of dough and place them on top of your cookie sheets lined with parchment paper. Place this tray in the fridge while you heat your oven to 350 F. When ready to bake, with the palm of your hand and very gentle, press each cookie ball down so they can flatten down a bit. Bake for about 10-11 minutes. Do not overbake or they will have a hard texture.
5.- Take them out from the oven and wait a couple of minutes, while the cookies are still hot place one thin square of Toblerone on top of each warm cookie. What I did, is cut one regular square in half and placed one half on top of each cookie. This worked pretty good for me and the right amount of chocolate for my taste.
6.- You can enjoy them while they are still warm or let them cool completely.
Enjoy, happy baking!
I hope you enjoy these cookies wherever you are dad.
Love.
Sandra.